A good family friend came to have a bird. A cockatiel, to be exact: brightly coloured, with a lemon zest plume arcing off his head, the same way a long feather would from an old-fashioned hat. My friend was an at-home psychoanalyst, seeing clients in the topmost room of his house. It wasn't clear if the bird was made his after his children grew bored of it, or if he had sought out companionship while his wife was at work and children at school. Either way, soon he had the constant companionship of Tweety, who rode on his shoulder pirate-style. Tweety-Bird accompanied him everywhere: during sessions, and throughout smoke breaks with the long skinny cigars my friend had brought over with him from France.
It was during one of those smoke breaks that Tweety made a break for it. My friend had the habit of clapping his hand over Tweety's legs to prevent possible escape, though the cockatiel seemed content to live inside the warm house. With a cigar in one glove and the mail in the other, my friend was helpless as Tweety launched off and spiraled into the afternoon sky.
Now, it wasn't the prospect of telling his family of Tweety's departure, or the potential loss of companionship that filled him with dread. Instead, if anything it was the inescapable truth that he lived in Winnipeg, one of the coldest locations in Canada, a country not well known for its beaches to begin with. And Tweety was facing one of the coldest nights of the upcoming winter, where temperatures dropped down to skin-freezing degrees and if one fell asleep outside it would be unlikely to wake up again.
He called his wife.
"Well, we can search the neighbourhood for him - he's a goddamn yellow cockatiel, we can spot him."
The neighbourhood watch turned up no sightings of the errant companion.
The veterinarian had the hard task of assuring the entire family of Tweety's inevitable demise, unless found before nightfall.
The next morning, my friend woke up with a heavy heart. Slipping on coat and gloves, he went outside for his first smoke of the day. And there, huddled down on the porch's iron railing, was Tweety. Stunned, he reached out and grabbed the shivering bird, lifting him off the railing. Except Tweety's feet remained locked around the metal bar, clinging on as tight as they could.
The veterinarian offered scant hope: they were to wrap him in a towel to warm him up, and to feed him his favourite food because he would surely die once thawed out.
Tweety did not die. Instead, he began to blink and twist his head around. The youngest daughter offered him his favourite treat. His beak, fully thawed, fell off with first peck. Not simply the tip or perhaps the upper or lower half. The footless bird was not beakless as well.
One last frantic call to the vet confirmed the endless spectre of death hanging over Tweety. With no beak, they were to soak cereal in milk, and press it against his bird-hole. Tweety eagerly scooped the proferred food into his bird-hole using his tongue. It was an unsettling sight, but then again it was the last supper of a dying bird.
Tweety lived for several years afterwards. He was carefully propped up in cups when in his cage. Unable to perch on his shoulder, my friend constructed a shoulder-holster to house Tweety, a regular at sessions. It's hard to say if Tweety's hard-knock life served as a hopeful message, or a dire warning to clients. But for Tweety, life was good again.
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